***WARNING***
This story doesn’t contain hearts and flowers, it doesn’t even contain the word ‘love’. It isn’t for the fainthearted, nor those who want romance and happy ever afters.
It’s dark, in fact it goes beyond the dark realms of misery and despair. It makes your heart suffer, it will beat you down and it will still demand more from you.
Yet, it is still a story of hope and courage. Friendships develop and understanding digs deep, whilst acceptance and surrender give way to reverence and sacrifice.
It contains disturbing scenes of sexual violence, cruelty and torture. It also includes self-harm, pain addiction and brutalisation.
Please bear this in mind before purchasing this book. Thank you.
The Devil visited me three times in my life, albeit, my short life. Not in the physical sense you must understand, but very much literally.
He was persistent, if not resolute and tenacious. His ruthless greed to annihilate me was utterly disturbed. I am sure if he had hierarchy, the man at the top would have dragged his arse into Hell prison just for his unscrupulous methods.
I was just fifteen when I first became aware of what he was capable of. This initial taste of him set the playing field for how my life was to be lived – for want of a better word.
He mocked me at this point, showed me mercilessly how he played the game, and how he liked to cheat at said game. He ridiculed and taunted until six months later, he won and took something of so much importance from me that I would never be the same again.
His second visit was, in my eyes, so much more cruel and heartless. I know we’re talking about the devil here, and yes, you have a right to say he had no heart, but even then, even when I was so utterly broken, I begged to differ and hoped – no prayed, that somewhere deep in the caverns of his black and tortured soul there was something that beat and confused his emotions once in a while.
But the third visit was somewhat different than the other two. He tried, and at first succeeded, to bring me to my knees once and for all but then something happened. God finally intervened and altered Satan’s intention; he sent hope and morphed the Devil’s minion into an Angel, hoping to break and shatter the anguish and suffering. He gave the ability for me to feel pleasure in pain, order in the chaos and light in the darkness.
But in giving me a reprieve, he also gave me something that would finally and ultimately obliterate me. He gave me the capability to love, therefore giving me the ability to be destroyed.
And Satan made sure that I was destroyed. Cruelly, viciously and sadistically.
I am Mae Swift, and this is the story of my decimation.
This story doesn’t contain hearts and flowers, it doesn’t even contain the word ‘love’. It isn’t for the fainthearted, nor those who want romance and happy ever afters.
It’s dark, in fact it goes beyond the dark realms of misery and despair. It makes your heart suffer, it will beat you down and it will still demand more from you.
Yet, it is still a story of hope and courage. Friendships develop and understanding digs deep, whilst acceptance and surrender give way to reverence and sacrifice.
It contains disturbing scenes of sexual violence, cruelty and torture. It also includes self-harm, pain addiction and brutalisation.
Please bear this in mind before purchasing this book. Thank you.
The Devil visited me three times in my life, albeit, my short life. Not in the physical sense you must understand, but very much literally.
He was persistent, if not resolute and tenacious. His ruthless greed to annihilate me was utterly disturbed. I am sure if he had hierarchy, the man at the top would have dragged his arse into Hell prison just for his unscrupulous methods.
I was just fifteen when I first became aware of what he was capable of. This initial taste of him set the playing field for how my life was to be lived – for want of a better word.
He mocked me at this point, showed me mercilessly how he played the game, and how he liked to cheat at said game. He ridiculed and taunted until six months later, he won and took something of so much importance from me that I would never be the same again.
His second visit was, in my eyes, so much more cruel and heartless. I know we’re talking about the devil here, and yes, you have a right to say he had no heart, but even then, even when I was so utterly broken, I begged to differ and hoped – no prayed, that somewhere deep in the caverns of his black and tortured soul there was something that beat and confused his emotions once in a while.
But the third visit was somewhat different than the other two. He tried, and at first succeeded, to bring me to my knees once and for all but then something happened. God finally intervened and altered Satan’s intention; he sent hope and morphed the Devil’s minion into an Angel, hoping to break and shatter the anguish and suffering. He gave the ability for me to feel pleasure in pain, order in the chaos and light in the darkness.
But in giving me a reprieve, he also gave me something that would finally and ultimately obliterate me. He gave me the capability to love, therefore giving me the ability to be destroyed.
And Satan made sure that I was destroyed. Cruelly, viciously and sadistically.
I am Mae Swift, and this is the story of my decimation.
Sav's Review
Let me start by saying, this book is dark. If you think you know dark, then you may be wrong. This is the darkest book I have ever read. So if dark isn't really your thing then this may not be the book for you. Heed my warning folks.
"The devil visited me three times in my life;albeit, my short life. Not in the physical sense, you must understand, but very much literally,"
This story is a heartbreaking one. Mae's parents and sister die when she is quite young. Leaving her alone. A young girl in foster care. This is when Mae starts her journey on self torture. She cuts, the blood is freeing, it's her release. She cannot stop.
Her life drastically changes the night she meets her knight in shining armor, Daniel. He comes in and swoops in and saves the day. He is wonderful, beautiful, and respectful in every way that counts. He was perfect... until he wasn't....
Turns out, Daniel was a wolf in sheeps clothing..
"You are the lamb. I am the shepard. I will control your every move. I will direct and govern you until you learn your place. And I will guide you along the path of your slaughter."
That's right folks, Mae not only was raped but was being held captive, being trained to be the best SLAVE that she could be. Daniel made me scream. He was evil. He was meant to be hated, but, I loved him and I HATED it. I hated loving a monster. He had a heavy hand and it didn't bother him to use it. Nuts right? I had to be experiencing Stockholm right?
Mae was tough cookie. She could be beaten. She could be battered. But Mae was special. She was scarred, broken, beautiful, headstrong, and did not fear death nor pain. Daniel would never break her soul.
In the midst of all the shit going on, the rape or the beatings or mind fuckery, somewhere in there, not sure when but the devil himself turns into the angel. Somewhere in this twisted story, lines get blurred. Bonds gets built, love gets strong.
I fell so in love with Daniel. Things seemed to be working their way out. Until the night that it all goes to hell. This is (what I didn't know at the time) was really the beginning of the end. It was coming. I knew it but I wasn't prepared for it. Nobody will be prepared for it.
This book took me on a journey, a journey that wasn't easy. It was hard. It was depressing. It was lonely. It was dark. It was beautiful. It was captivating. It gave me hope.
Most will probably think this book does not have a HEA. And in a traditional sense, it doesn't. But in my honest opinion, it does have a HEA, of course I can't give you details without ruining it. But I will say, some will get it and some will not. This (to me) was truly Ms.Sidebottoms best book yet. I loved it from start to finish. This book gets 5 Gut-twisting stars!
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